What is the Stantonian Association of Interesting People?

My friends, this blog is dedicated to those men and women who go out of their way to be remarkably interesting. In other words, all of those fascinating Stanton students (or, in the rarest of cases, students from other schools) can join this blog to appreciate creative writing developed by us students. I, Braden Beaudreau, the creator of this blog, will post my past, present, and future works on this website, and those who join and comment will get the same opportunities. May all of you live in happiness and peace, and never forget: being interesting is the only way to stand out from the masses.

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Date Two

Dinner, or something.  I pick her up in my car
and I decide to get out as she's walking
up and give her a hug.  I open
her door and close it after her.  We talk
about George H.W. Bush's FSX policy in the late 80s
because it's on my mind and
I'm not good at small talk.

Table for two.  Damn, this food is expensive
but I want to give the impression that I'm not a poor.
She is a good-looking person but she tried too hard
again
and I'm waiting to be attracted
again
and it's not happening.  I become
less attracted when she says she doesn't drink
because I'm an alcoholic that rules out an easy way
of getting to know her.

The chicken parm is massive!  I eat
maybe a quarter of it.  She eats more
than me, which is a challenge to my masculinity.
I fail to catch up anyway.  She is surprised
when I say I play basketball,
intramural basketball, of course.  I'm basically
the LeBron of the team - the tallest player
and also a great shooter.  Yeah, I'm 5'11.
I'm valuable.
We've won two games in three years.
That's a poor percentage.

I flex my monetary capital and pay for her dinner.
We're having a solid talk about Game of Thrones.  I used to think
only certain chicks watch good TV but now I know that
all of them do and it's all they talk about
so they aren't special to me anymore.  I don't know
how to leave the table smoothly so I say
I need to practice a presentation
and I stand up
carrying a very serious facial expression.
It must be done, the expression says to her.

We walk to my car and talk about the snow.
I consider the possibility of holding her hand
but I don't, because I don't
have any feelings for her.  I drop her
off and stay in my car.  No goodbye
hug, again.  I don't like her.  Fuck.
My ex is such a fucking whore.

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